
You can punch us intellectually any time, Mr. Goldblum.
If we are to believe Hollywood, the 4th of July is not about barbecues, fireworks, beer, or the adoption of that one Declaration. It’s about US presidents delivering patriotic and emotional speeches before indulging in badassery, like killing aliens.
Now, we all know that online dating under President Bill Pullman would be practically nonexistent, since, you know, he’d be running a constant risk of being punched in the face by Jeff Goldblum (both physically and intellectually). In ID4 Goldblum is shown capable of hacking an alien mothership using a Mac, for crying out loud, so he would have no problems getting into the President’s profile (unless, it was encrypted with the SkaDate Dating Software, of course) and finding out what really went on between Pullman and Goldblum’s ex-girlfriend…
In all seriousness, though, the real US presidents are actually far more cooler than their cinematic caricatures, so let’s take a look at our history and deliberate what the world of online dating would be like under four great US presidents.